What is your favorite color?

I was asked this question by someone who was introduced to me by a common friend – a possible date, a possible romantic relationship lead. I find it interesting how this can be a standard getting-to-know question. I admit, I have used this question too and have answered people who asked me this question. But my question is why? Why ask, “what is your favorite color?” Will it tell us something about the person? Will it be useful for future of one’s relationship? I do not remember my ex-boyfriend’s favorite color but I am sure I asked him that question when we were dating.

Another standard getting to know question is “what is your zodiac sign?” This I could understand. When one asks for their Zodiac sign, one automatically reflects on what personality characteristics their potential friend - or better yet, their potential lover possesses: a Gemini is flexible, adaptable, and has mood swings; an Aries is creative, insightful, and loyal; a Taurus is stubborn but generous and passionate lovers. But are these even true? Do astrological signs really predict relationship compatibility?

My scientist self will laugh at this. There are a lot of scientifically valid and reliable personality inventories. The MBTI (Myers & Briggs Type Indicator is a personality that categorizes people into one of 16 categories like ENFP or ISTJ), for example, have been used for organizations and counseling couples in understanding group and relationship dynamics. Another psychological construct (which is close to my heart because I am writing a thesis on this!) called adult romantic attachment style has proven that it predicts relationship dynamics. Having a preoccupied, avoidant, or secure attachment will tell me more on how you will think, emotionally react, and even behave in intimate relationships than knowing if you are a Cancer, Sagittarius, or a Libra.

But still, even me, I asked this person, who was introduced to me by a common friend – a possible date, a possible romantic relationship lead, “what is your Zodiac sign?” And I even silently wished that his answer would be Aries. (I tend to like (or love) people with an Aries sign.)

Why ask, “what is your Zodiac sign?” I guess the answer is, it works for people – easier, uncomplicated, available. One does not need a PhD or write a thesis about astrological signs to get a little peek of the personality of that someone you want to know (even if it is unreliable). It is fast, quick, very useful, and it allows people to get by in their daily lives. These are heuristics - as what cognitive psychologists would say. And, heuristics are cognitively efficient. (Di masakit sa ulo, kung baga!) =)

But still, why the question, “what is your favorite color?”

“I like bright colors: yellow and orange. But for clothes, I think blue. I look good in blue.” I replied.

“Aries,” was his reply.